Friday Five

Five Things I Don’t Miss about America

Stupid People
There were times I would cover my face with my hands shaking my head at the closed-minded, unintelligent people on television, on the radio, facebook, or other mediums of communication. ‘Is this really what the rest of my fellow citizens are like?’ I would think to myself. To those people, I don’t miss you at all. Not that there is any shortage in the ¬†population of the feeble-minded here, but I can just pretend like I don’t understand them and walk away. Or make fun of them to their face in English (with a smile plastered on my face of course).

Reality Television
I imagine stupid people really like the classic reality show and enjoy talking about it. I went through that stage when I was a young, procrastinator in school, but then I turned 21, graduated from college, and didn’t really enjoy watching people get drunk and party anymore. I have this crazy notion to go out and live my own life than watch someone else’s on television. In Thailand, no one relishes who got voted off ‘Dancing with the Stars’ and should that ever be the case, refer to the last sentence of ‘stupid people.’ For the record, I think Jersey Shore is fucking retarded. If you value your brain cells, I suggest you refrain from watching it.

Stress of the ‘American Dream’
Graduate college. Meet boy. Get good job working 40 hours a week. Marry boy. Pop out 2.5 babies. Go to the beach on vacation. Call yourself dangerous. That’s nice for some people, but it’s not for me. I’m really glad that’s not what people expect from me here. Though there are several Thais that have decided for me that I’m to get married in Thailand after Peace Corps, settle in and crack out some children for them to dote on. I’m totally serious.

Keeping up with the Joneses
This obviously goes along with the above. Don’t let the Buddhism fool you, there’s a lot of competition/materialism in Thailand. As only a semi-permanent resident, I don’t need or want to acquire possessions that demonstrate my material wealth (apparently having white skin is plenty sufficient for that). PC salaries don’t really allow for it either. I’m not accumulating worthless shit and I like it that way.

Two words: election year. Well that and the Republican party’s primary. I stopped following it months ago because I found it too depressing and try to ignore the snippets that penetrate my Thai cocoon. To those in the United States, I feel sorry for you. With the growing retardedness that is American politics, I’m really glad I live in a place that makes me look back and think the US is a pretty great place to be. Well at least rather than listen to the drivel that is pumped out by the media and the wacky proposals brought forth that make me question the future of my motherland.


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